Monday, May 11, 2009

This Past Weekend

This weekend was originally planned as a belated drunken Cinco de Mayo celebration.
I needed a break. I'm job hunting, dread going to work the few hours I'm scheduled, and am more sedentary than I want to be. I was going to go away to read and sit by the fire and drink and hike up to the hot springs and just relax for 3 days out of range of cell phone service, without internet access.

Instead it turned into a weekend filled with friends' children and wholesome fun and lots of cooking. Thankfully, above all, it was drama free, and everyone avoided dwelling on the things that are not going smoothly back in town. Car trouble left me relying on friends for transportation, and I'm back in town a day early.

After this weekend, I'm more willing to move away from town into a one room cabin. My friend laughs at my desire to have a washer, dryer, dishwasher and clawfoot tub in that one room cabin. Refridgerator, water closet, and range and oven are a given. A loft for sleeping and reading. A large table, and shelves and seating area. Is there really anything else I really need?

The best feeling was falling asleep last night, after hiking and spending time in the hot springs, a hot shower, a little beer and food, time by the fire, and the electricity in my body changed from the erratic pulsating nearly painful current across my back to a warm gentle buzz/hum.

I'm dreading work Tuesday, and I don't like the fact I have to suck it up and fake happiness to get through the work day. I had a chance to think about what would make me happy, careerwise, and there are elements of what I am doing now that I would enjoy. The elements missing from what I should be doing are having my hours cut, a loss of my office (that's right, they took away my office) and the struggle to "teach" people unable and uninterested in learning and enrichment and interaction and who have given up and are set in their ways and don't listen.

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